It’s Friday, so it’s time for another installment of “I Could Learn From…” It’s my weekly discipline of looking at the life of someone who’s influenced, or could influence me.  I list two or three things that I could learn from that person’s life.

Since the cat is out of the bag– I’ve got new position at my church and I’ll begin training my replacement over the next few months– I thought this would be good week to feature Chris-Yount Jones. Chris has lead me from afar in her role as Champion of Children’s Resources at Group Publishing. Here are some things I’ve learned and need to continue learning from Chris:

You Can Be Excellent and Authentic: Being around Chris, in person or in her writing, is a breath of fresh air. Make no mistake, Chris gets things done and done well. She’s leads vibrant teams and has her hands on the pulse of trends, educational philosophies, best practices, and bravely innovates. “Buzz”, the curriculum line she helped mastermind, embodies what the future of teaching digital natives should be.

At the same time, Chris’  voice is understated and down-to-earth. She writes about struggles navigating parenthood and how tough personnel matters make her insecure. The result is that Chris simultaneously disarms and challenges the leaders she encounters. That’s a powerful one-two punch. (more…)

It’s Friday, which means it’s time for another installment of “I Could Learn From…” These posts make up my weekly learning curriculum where I try to learn from the lives of the people around me, whether in my immediate community, or those from afar. To see past installments of “I Could Learn From…” click that category on the right side bar.

I’ve spent this summer researching for a class I’m developing for my church. Grace is a rapidly growing congregation and we’ve found that we’ve collected a politically diverse bunch. Unfortunately, we find our challenged during election years to talk about politics in a civil fashion. We’ve got godly people on each side of the political spectrum in disbelief that the other side could vote Republican or Democrat and still claim to be Christ-followers. The goal of this course is to open up some healthy dialogue and to provoke everyone to re-evaluate their political convictions against Scripture.

I downloaded Jim Wallis’ God’s Politics and have been devouring it this past week. Jim is the founder of Sojourner’s Magazine and has a prophetic voice for both the church and government. Here are three things that I’ve been reminded of reading Wallis: (more…)

I’m narrowing the focus of this blog to Christmas, but I can’t make myself give up this column. I’m finding the discipline of viewing someone’s life as a learning curriculum for myself to be too valuable. This week, Michael Hyatt is in the hot seat. Michael is the CEO of Thomas Nelson, the largest Christian publisher. I’m a regular reader of his blog, which is filled with invaluable information about leadership, social media, and the writing industry.

Here’s three things I could learn from Michael:

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I’m going to drop this week’s edition of “I Could Learn From…” a few days early. Today is Amy and my fourteenth wedding anniversary. I’m convinced that God designed individuals to be attracted to people with “opposite” personalities to place creative tension (conflict) into marriage. This conflict creates a kind of curriculum for each partner that has the potential to make them more like God, or not. I have learned much from Amy and still have much to learn from her. Here are three things I am learning from Amy:

How to Take Strings off of Love: I remember coming home being really angry at one of the men in the church. He was a horrible father and husband and in his selfishness was dismantling his family at an amazing rate. This guy claimed to want help from the pastors, but at the end of the day nothing any of us said provoked life change. I vented my frustration to Amy and if I remember right wanted to avoid being in a social situation where I’d have to hang out with this guy. I expected Amy to listen supportively. Instead, she tore into me for not being willing to be friends with this guy even if he never changed. My love for this guy ended at the point where I was unable to change him. Amy doesn’t tolerate that in me. I’m lucky to have a wife this wise.

That Heaven is More Like a Party than a Library: I love books and writing and solitude and being lost in a Miles Davis album. Amy loves crowds, heavy metal, and people. Being married to Amy has placed me next to mosh pits and in wedding parties and more social settings than I’d be in on my own. When I read the Gospels and the Parable of the Wedding Feast, I see a version of Heaven that is close to Amy’s version of a good night out than mine. I’m not seeing mosh pits in the Gospels, but I guess her version approximates Jesus’ heaven better than mine.

How to be Gentle: My parent style bends more toward structure than Amy’s. That not a criticism of Amy, she’s better at listening and nurture and I’m better at the consistent rules thing. Of course, if left to my own devices I could stray toward being rigid and distance. Amy reminds me to be emotionally present and supportive.

Thanks Amy. I know I have more to learn from you. Gratefully, I have a life time to do it.

Each week I post three things that I could learn from significant person. Call my personal growth agenda. I just finished reading Eric Metaxas’ excellent biography Bonhoeffer on the elliptical machine. This isn’t the first Bonhoeffer bio I’ve read, but as I finished the book I found myself fighting back tears. I’m glad I gathered myself. Tears might have short circuited my e-reader and it’s not particularly manly to cry over a book in the gym.

Here’s three things that I could stand to learn from Bonhoeffer:

1. How to Be Joyful: Dietrich was a serious theologian and an astute thinker. He also knew how to enjoy people. I was moved by how those around him remembered his playfulness and joy. Dietrich played soccer with his seminary students and softened the line between teacher and pupil. Those who eulogized him called him the most gentle and lovable person they knew. Dostoevsky has a famous quote it being easier to love humanity than it is a single individual. Bonhoeffer didn’t share in that struggle. His great love of God lead to a great love of people.

2. That a Theology of Engagement Matters: Bonhoeffer loved God and he loved thinking ideas about God. But he never lost himself inside his systems and theological constructs. He knew that his beliefs and conflicts always needed to lead to an embrace of the world around him. He was convinced that the church existed to protect those that the state victimized. He saw his engagement to Maria as a “yes” to God’s world. A few weeks ago Don Miller blogged that “the context for spirituality is not spirituality”, Dietrich would have affirmed those words.

3. Seek Truth and Make Friends with Everyone Along the Way: Bonhoeffer’s lived in a time where theological opinion was diving along theologically conservative and liberal lines. In America, Christian Fundamentalist squared off with theological liberals. In Europe, Karl Barth’s notion that the Bible was revelation from God was a bomb-shell. Bonhoeffer (which every group today wants to claim) had some ideas that were conservative for his day. However, he enjoy the company of  those with more liberal leanings. He studied under a liberal professor and made sure that he understood the logic presented to him, and not some distortion of it. When Bonhoeffer visited America he was disturbed by the quality of theological discourse. Each camp lobbied insults again the other, but nobody seemed to be able to articulate the nature of the disagreement between the two sides. Winning the culture war seemed more important than knowing truth. Bonhoeffer had the ability of befriending and dialogging with any serious thinker, regardless of his or her views.

If I could weave these qualities into my life I’d be better for it.

Back to the “I Could Learn From…” series. NFL camps are just around this corner and I’m a bit glum that Donovan McNabb will be absent at the Eagles camp after 10 years of being with the team. McNabb’s rise happened about the time my oldest son became aware of football.  My son is now driving and is a handful of years away from launching into adulthood. So McNabb’s Easter day trade marks time in my household as well as with the Philadelphia Eagles. Here are three things I could learn from McNabb:

1) Tuning out the Critics: McNabb is the NFL’s version of Job. He’s one of the good guys in the sport. He’s a family man, displays high character, and has virtually set every record in the Eagles’ book. Even so, he’s endured racially charged venom from Rush Limbaugh, the wrath of professional narcissist, Terrel Owens, and grumblings of an ungrateful Philly fan base. The only thing he is guilty of is not winning a ring, as if he’s capable of accomplishing that by himself.

In the face of all this, McNabb keeps his focus on the game. For the most part he’s refused to get drawn into responding to all these critics. He’s too busy bettering himself to play their game.

2) Keeping the Team Loose: I’m going to miss Donovan’s clowning around on the sidelines. No matter how big the game was, “5″ always had the ability to smile, joke, and keep his team mates from becoming overwhelmed with the pressure.

3) The Art of Redefining Yourself: When Donovan came into the game, he was green like any other rookie QB. Donovan had, at best, a pedestrian receiving core. So Donovan created plays with his legs. Over time, Donovan aged and suffered injuries. So he evolved his game and became a top-flight pocket passer. I could learn from his example. Rapidly changing times demand rapidly evolving leaders.

McNabb, thanks for the memories. I wish you the best. And hey, you really didn’t owe Philadelphia that apology. But it was a classy thing to do.

Here’s the second installment of my Friday Feature, “I Could Learn From…” If you want to see past weeks, simply click on the “I Could Learn From…” category.

This week, I’m featuring my church’s Executive Pastor, Derek Sanford. I’ve worked with, and then for, Derek for thirteen years. No matter how I grow as a leader, I can’t outgrow this guy. Here’s three (more) things I thing I could learn from Derek:

1. Holy Discontent: Derek is never satisfied where things are today, no matter how good they are. He’s constantly got his nose in the future and informing our team just how broken today is. He’s always finding higher ground and challenging us to get there. (I do wonder if Derek will hate Heaven since there will be nothing to change.)

2. Relational AND Task Oriented: Derek’s got much on his plate right now. In addition to leading our church and caring for his family, he’s also working on his Master’s degree. I needed to get some his input on some big decisions I need to make in my departments, so I scripted a few questions that would get to the heart of the matter. I planned on using 15 minutes of his time at most. I went into his office focused on business. Derek stopped me, connected relationally, and then got to business. I’m a task-oriented guy. I could learn from Derek’s ability to value people no matter how busy he is.

3. Situational Leadership: Derek is a student of everyone he supervises. I’ve noticed that he doesn’t lead any of us the same way. He seems to know which off us tends to need high levels of supervision and who doesn’t. He knows who is motivated by affirmation and encouragement and who just needs a new hill to die on to feel needed. When I watch Derek lead, I’m reminded that none of my volunteers have the same needs. Some joined the team to be a part of a community and to make friends. Others are here to achieve. It’s on me to take the time to, in Derek’s words, “unlock that person” and figure out what makes them tick and feel alive.

I’m trying a new Friday feature, “I Think I Could Learn from…” It’s exactly what it sounds like.  Every week I’ll write about someone that I either know or wish I knew, and list three topics in which  I think that person could help me grow. I’ll feature celebrities or politicians you know and people you’ve never met. I’ll occasionally toss in people who I have strong disagreement with, but who still have admirable features in their life I should imitate. I’m looking forward to seeing how this feature develops because I’m hoping the discipline of writing these posts will set a learning agenda for myself.

This week, here are three things I think I could learn from NYT’s best selling author and founder of The Mentoring Project, Donald Miller:

How to Get Along in God’s Big Tent: Don’s speaking has him rubbing shoulders with the folk all over the theological and political landscapes. He seems to enjoy everyone’s company the same. Inevitably, Don finds himself monitored by the self-appointed thought police who sees who Don shares a beer with, or whose task force he is on, and concludes that Mr. Miller is a menace to the ancient faith. Don doesn’t seem to waste a lot of breath defending himself or distancing himself from any of his “questionable” friends. Don seems to understand the art of being misunderstood. I’d love to learn what mental disciplines Don has cultivated to get to this place.

How to Stay Self Motivated: I think I’m self motivated. I husband, parent, father, and write books.  The truth is that I’m married to a woman I don’t want disappoint and I serve on a team of highly creative and driven people. I’ve got some scaffolding while Don has to create his own motivation. I think I could benefit from hearing how Don keeps himself driven.

How to Promote a Book: Blue Like Jazz was a surprise hit. I want to hear the story behind the story. It’s a great book and one that touched a nerve for countless people who struggle with the excesses of American Evangelicalism. Yes, it’s a book for our time. But it’s success couldn’t have just happened.  Great books don’t sell themselves. Sure there are factors like timing and luck. But “luck” is short hand having your act together and being ready for opportunity when it knocks. I’d want to ask Don about the sweat equity and strategy that he put into promoting the book.

Next Friday: Three (New) Things I could Learn from Derek Sanford (My Boss).